47. Motivation for Success: From "I Have To" to "I Want To"

What transformative impact would you experience in your life if you could approach each of your goals and tasks with genuine enthusiasm rather than out of necessity?

In this episode, Monica and I discuss the power of shifting your mindset from "I have to" to "I want to" or "I get to." We explore how this simple shift can drastically change your entire experience, from personal development to business endeavors. We also provide practical tools for overcoming a victim mentality and becoming the author of your own life.

You'll discover inspiration and tips on moving yourself from thinking “I have to do this" to "I get to do this” and how to create a more positive and empowered mindset.

You'll learn how to:

• Turn your negative mindset into a positive one
• Motivate and empower yourself
• Identify and overcome a victim mentality

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Chapters

• 1:39 Shifting your mindset
• 4:41 Goal setting with gratitude.
• 8:17 Instagram as a Business Tool.
• 10:40 Taking responsibility for your life.

Transcript

0:58

Hello and welcome to the Profitable Nomad Couple podcast. This is a show where we share all of our secrets about building a sustainable location-independent lifestyle. We're Austin and Monica. We're a digital nomad couple here to help you develop an entrepreneurial mindset, ignite your passions, and develop a purpose-driven online business. Get ready for weekly insights and inspiring stories to empower you to live life on your own terms. So are you ready to unlock the nomad mindset and embrace a life of limitless possibilities? Let's dive in! Okay, my friends, we have a pretty bomb topic for today. This is one that Monica and I are both very passionate about. And it's all about shifting your mindset from, I have to do something, to I want to do something, or even I get to do something. There's a big difference, and not only is there a difference in the moment when you're doing something, it's going to drastically change the whole outcome of your future. Any of your endeavors, your business endeavors, your relationship endeavors, your personal development endeavors, all depend on whether you view something as, I have to do this, or I get to do this. Yeah, this really comes back to the fact that there are no rules in life. You don't actually have to do anything if you don't want to. So if we can reframe our minds instead of, I have to do this, I have to get up, I have to go to the gym, I have to go to work, into I get to go to the gym, I get to move my body, I get to go earn money and sustain my family, then we change our state of mind from being this victim of life to life happening to them into the author of your life. You get to create your reality, you get to choose what you do each and every day, and it's such an empowering place to be and such an empowering place to make decisions and to create the life that you actually want to be living. Yeah, so we're going to break this down a little bit for you guys. So and I want to do this and I get to do this attitude that comes from a space of intrinsic motivation. You're doing it because this action or this whatever it is that you're doing aligns with your values, it aligns with your purpose. Even if in the moment, like I'll be honest, sometimes those things do kind of suck. But its purpose is to lead you to a goal that you've chosen to lead you to some outcome that you want for yourself. And so you get to do those actions because it takes you where you want to go versus this. I have to do something like Monica said, that's a victim mentality. And that comes from this, this feeling of extrinsic obligation, somebody else is telling you you have to do something if you want to get this result, but you either don't believe it or you don't actually want to do it. And so you play the victim card and you say, okay, I got to do this again. And it weighs you down and it makes those actions harder to do. We're going to give you guys a couple examples to help solidify this in your head. So our first example is with going to the gym, just like we've already kind of mentioned. If you go to the gym, because you have to in order to have a fit body and you want a fit body, but you're thinking I have to go to the gym, man, you're going to go to the gym like three times maybe. And then, you know, the fourth, fifth day you're going to wake up, you're like, I don't want to really go to the gym today. It's just another thing I have to do, just another thing on my list, another thing filling up my calendar. And you're going to quit going to the gym so fast. And I know because that's been me probably dozens of times, I've told myself I'm going to start working out and it's just something I have to do. And then you don't do it very long versus let's say you have this goal of being healthier and more fit, you want to drop 50 pounds. And so your desired outcome, it's the same desired outcome. You want that healthy body, you want to be, you want to feel better about yourself, be more confident. But instead of saying I have to do this to get there, you're saying I want that. And so therefore I want to wake up early to go to the gym. I want to lift weights for 20 minutes. I want to go on this mile run or jog. I'm able to go to the gym. I have a body that is physically able to be worked out. Yeah, definitely include gratitude in there. Be grateful for what you have that allows you to take the steps to reach that goal. And I promise you, if that's your attitude going into it, then you're going to stick with that habit for so much longer and you're going to be exponentially more likely to actually achieve that goal that you want. And again, it's the same goal, but you're more likely to achieve it on this path. And it's going to be way more fun to strive to this goal and to be making progress to this goal than if you are the victim of your own goal and you quote unquote have to go do this thing. A really personal example in our lives and our business is our Instagram account for years ever since we started our business. It was, oh, I have to post content. Oh, shoot. Now I have to do reels. Now I have to find trending videos. Now I have to do engagement. And it was miserable. I absolutely hated it. And I never I was so inconsistent with it. And we never saw any results from it. And it was just so frustrating. And then we'd quit. And then, you know, a little while later, we'd have, you know, a business coach, a mentor be like, hey, you need to be on Instagram. We'd be like, oh, you're right. I have to be on Instagram. I have to be working on this. I have to be producing content. And it was such a drag. And it really affected how we showed up on Instagram. It really affected how much our business was able to grow from Instagram and from other social media platforms. In contrast, just this last year or so, we've had this major shift in our mindset to where we realize that we get to show up on Instagram. We get to provide really valuable content for people. We get to connect with people and we get to really capitalize on the social part of social media. And it is a total game changer. We absolutely love Instagram. We love showing up there. We love connecting with people. We love creating content. We're still a little bit awkward, a little bit dorky when we create content, but we are genuinely having fun with it. And it is literally a night and day difference. And you can see it in our numbers. You can see it in our engagement. You can see it in our momentum in our business. And all it had to do with that little tiny mindset shift. And it's so powerful. Yeah, I'm actually going to borrow a story from Dean Grassiose. If you have heard of him or follow him, there's a good chance you've heard the story because he shares a lot because it's a really good one. When he started his business endeavors, one of his first businesses that he started was selling cars. Or I think it was a course on how to fix up your own car. I think it's what it was. And when he started, this was like way before the digital age, like it was just getting started. And so in order to advertise his course and his services, he had to film an infographic or an infomercial and then he had to pay people to air it on their TV or on their station. And then he had to pay for the printouts of the manuals that went along with this course. And then he had to pay a warehouse to stock them and then to ship them. He had invested two hundred and fifty thousand dollars before this whole thing even got started, before he was able to air his infomercial and start sharing his services with people. A couple of decades passed. Now we're here today. And for zero dollars in, you can create a business account on Instagram and you can market yourself. You can connect with hundreds of thousands of potential clients because they're on the platform and you don't have to put a single dollar into it. Just time and some effort. And so if you think of things in that light, it's much easier to think of this as wow, I have this great opportunity to grow my business that even 15, 20 years ago no one else had the chance to do it in this way. I have a much better leg up or I have a much better chance, ease of connecting with people. And that makes it easier to be grateful for what you have and to to shift into this I get to because I want to mentality versus I have to. Yeah, definitely. And like Austin mentioned earlier, a really, really easy way to shift into this mindset is to project yourself into the future. What do you actually want for your future? What do you want your life to look like? And then work backwards. So what steps do I need to take today to get to that future? So something that's really powerful for me, I am a very tactile, very visual learner. So I wanted to be able to project myself into the future and figure out what kind of life I wanted to live. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't see it in my mind. So what I did is I went to Pinterest and I created a Pinterest board and I kept it a secret because I didn't want to have to worry about anybody else seeing these things or judging me for these things. So I made it a secret Pinterest board and then I made different categories and I said, this is what I want my life to look like. This is what I want my business to look like. This is what I want my body to look like. These are the clothes I want to wear. This is how I want to show up for myself. And then I went through and I filled out these boards. And every day when I have a hard time imagining or a hard time motivating myself, I go back to my Pinterest board and I scroll through it and I visually see my dream life and I can put myself in a position where I'm able to live that life. And then as I do that, I'm able to say, OK, I get to take these steps today towards my dream life. I get to hold on to this vision for myself and now start to make progress to it. And it instantly boosts my motivation. And it's such a powerful tool for switching your mindset. And now you can't just like it's not a light switch. You don't just switch it on and then it's fine. Everything's hunky dory and you're able to to just have this perfect mindset of being the author of your life and I get to do these things. It's something that's going to take constant work. It's a muscle that you're going to have to work. And even after after years of practicing this, it's still going to creep in. So you're still going to have to pay attention to that. But if you can start now to form the habits and give yourself the tools for when that victim mentality creeps in, you can instantly go switch it again. Right. So now that I've been using my Pinterest board for a while to help me switch out a victim mentality, it's like a no brainer. Like sometimes I find myself opening Pinterest and I didn't even consciously recognize that I was in victim mentality. It just becomes a really quick and easy tool to help you switch your mindset back to the way you want it to go so you can continue to make forward progress. Yeah. You've got to shift from being the victim to taking responsibility. Like you are ultimately responsible for all the actions that you take. And the more you can internalize that idea, the easier it's going to be to make this shift. So challenges are still going to come. Like there's still going to be hard things. There's still going to be things that maybe you don't want to do. But it's if you're intrinsically motivated and you keep this larger, farther off goal present in your mind, like bring it closer to their present day, it's going to make that process easier. It's going to make it more fun. It's going to make it more manageable. And you're going to be more likely to actually obtain that goal. Yeah. So we just want to leave you with the challenge to go through your life and maybe journal this down. Journaling is such a powerful tool that I'm really terrible at, but I'm learning at how powerful it is in my life. So maybe take a pen and paper and just brain dump all of the ways that you have been showing up with victim mentality. And then I want you to switch that and start writing down all of the tools that you can use to switch yourself off of victim mentality and to really, really, really and truly become the author of your life. And to recognize that you don't have to do anything. You get to create life. You get to live in this beautiful world and you get to be the author of your life. You get to decide. You get to decide what you do with your life. You get to decide how your life turns out. So we're going to leave you with that today and we'll catch you next week. Thanks so much for joining us here on the profitable Nomad Couple podcast. We appreciate you listening to us today. If you enjoyed this episode, share it on Instagram and be sure to tag us at Austin and Monica. Together we can inspire others to embrace a location independent lifestyle. And while you're there, we'd love to connect with you. So make sure you follow us for more tips and inspiration on living your dream location independent lifestyle. Until next week, remember that you have the power to shape your own path. So stay curious, stay adventurous and stay connected.